Getting a New 👩🏻‍💻 or Whateva

Hey reader,

How have you been doing? I hope all is well. We may not know each other personally, but I want you to know that you got this! Fighting! Hihihi. I seem to be in a good mood, right? Anyway, here’s why:

I bought a new laptop yay! I purchased it two days ago and it’ll be delivered in 2 weeks. The thought of owning a new laptop hasn’t sunk in with me yet until tonight. So then I suddenly got into a really good mood and I literally grab my laptop and started typing. My old lappy has been with me for a whole 6 years now. It’s still fully functioning and no damage whatsoever. My only concern is when I try to edit, the fan goes supersonic on me. It’s driving me nuts.

Another thing is that I’ve been wanting to have the freedom to edit my videos anywhere and anytime I like. But with my current situation, I can only edit on my iMac because it’s the only decent computer that would make it as far as importing and not go freeze.

I was working on my newest vlog which is all about my birthday week. It was a week-long vlog, so you could imagine the number of footage I have. Anyhow, my hard drive gave up on me while I was importing my videos. Then I bought more space in Google Drive hoping it would solve the problem, but it didn’t. Then I was like, okay seriously, I need a new laptop.

I’m super grateful for this blessing. I’m sure my new laptop will last for more than 6 years. I’ll have to pass down this oldie to my baby brother. I can’t wait! I’m gonna post my new baby when it comes. Hihi.

xoxo,

g

Hello 26 ✨

I just turned 26 yesterday. I took a 4-day vacation from work to take a rest. It was exactly what I needed after a stressful month.

My friends gave me presents that I actually could use omg. One gave me a Swiss knife which is the complete replica of what I lost 5 years ago—I screamed a little when I received it. I also received a hairdryer which is so useful because mine broke a month ago and my hair has been looking like it belongs in the jungle. A big thanks to all of you for actually giving me something practical. 🥺 This is the best birthday I’ve had in Canada. I didn’t enjoy my birthdays when I was still living at White Rock. Not only was I living quite far from Vancouver at that time, but also I was stressing with my studies.

Two days before my birthday, my ex-housemate planned a dinner with us at DT Vancouver. We had drinks after work at Cactus Club. It was our first night out together. Hopefully, there’s more in the future!

The day before my birthday, I made stuff happen on my special day. I realize that waiting for something good to happen without doing something about it is just stupid. So I bought myself a cake and candle to blow at midnight. I also ask my housemates if they could celebrate it with me. It worked pretty well because on that same day we had a little gathering at the house, so everyone was in a party mood. Just minutes before midnight, two of my other friends crashed the party and made it even more fun. I love how it all turned out in the end.

On the day of my birthday, I woke up late around lunchtime. I was too drunk from the night before. But I still managed to have afternoon drinks with my Filipino friends. They gave me a 1.14L Jack Daniels as a gift. Damn it. I was planning to go clean na after my birthday. Charot. I really should because I’m having my vaccination next Saturday. Anyway, we went to an ice cream shop in Richmond. They were no tables available inside, so we crowded outside the shop. Good thing the weather was nice!

And that’s how my birthday celebration went. It sounded so chill, but I’m so glad I have today as a rest day to recover from all the madness. I am extremely grateful for all the people who made my day special! Now, I can’t wait to get back to work tomorrow and wait for Friday to come again! Hahaha. Always something to look forward to, right?

Thanks for reading, love.

xoxo,

G

Hey,

What’s up? It’s almost midnight again. Lately, I’ve been having a hard time sleeping. I’m not sure if it’s my daily coffee intake that’s causing this but it’s not like I increased my caffeine dosage. Anyway, I feel so unhappy with my work. I wanna quit soon. I wanna quit now. I’m not sure why but I feel so restless.

I wanna quit my job… Ghad I feel so frustrated I wanna scream so loud 😦

thoughts on a sunday morning

Good morning! I feel relax today knowing that I’m finally done with my CELPIP exam. I took it yesterday morning for 2.5 hours. It was an exhausting couple of days anticipating it that I was always anxious whenever I thought about it. It wasn’t a very difficult exam, but just another bothering task. The result is to be expected this week, hopefully, it’s not too bad. I didn’t review that much, so I’m not hoping for a great score anyway.

I woke up at 7 am today with nothing on my mind. I wasn’t that hungry, but since I’m so used to eating breakfast I made myself a coffee and bread. Then, I started watching a Netflix movie before I remembered I have to at least write something today. I’ve been wanting to do it since last month but the motivation wasn’t always that strong.

This coming June, I will be applying for my permanent residency here in Canada. Wow. Time flies, eh? I am hoping that my application gets to be picked almost as instant after I apply. Although it is always unpredictable, I’m still optimistic about the lower score since we’re still in the middle of a pandemic.

Another thing I’m looking forward is to travel soon. It’s either my family visits me here in Canada or I travel out of the country. I miss planning and booking for places I want to see. And I know there are more important things to be thinking about right now, but it’s just been too long.

Of course, I always think about how grateful where I am for this life at such a young age. Sometimes when I look back, I tell myself how on earth was I able to achieved all of this? I remember being lost for a long time and finding my worth again. To tell you, it was beating myself to get out of that black hole that pushed me to do great things. As there are always positive outcomes in every darkness we face, I make sure to purge out every goodness in disappointments in my life. I always move forward, so should you.

It’s been a little over a year since the pandemic happened and I still use the same excuse for being idle. I don’t see myself exerting more effort than I know I could. But I think it’s time to admit to myself that I need to start improving myself again. It’s time to find out a little deeper about myself.

It’s such an interesting morning today. I guess once I started writing, all of my thoughts wanted all at once to be written. I wanted to write more, but this post doesn’t need more random things right now. I shall save it for the next ones.

Have a great day, you.

Love,

Gee

hi self,

I know January is almost over and I can start hearing yourself asking the accomplishments you’ve done so far this year. I can also feel the slight disappointment in you every time that question arises. I hope you don’t get too hard on yourself. I want you to know that whatever you do in every single day is a contribution to your future goals in life. Be happy. Be present. Be patient.

xx

Merry Little Christmas 2020

Holiday greetings from Canada! It’s currently 9 pm here in Vancouver. You would think there’d be some big Christmas celebration, but nope, no thanks to this pandemic. We, however, had a lovely lunch together with the host family and Korean housemates. I didn’t feel the Christmas spirit just until we were busy passing the food around the table earlier. Afterward, I just head back to my room where I had been and will be spending the rest of the weekend. I’m supposed to start editing another vlog, but my editing spirit is on vacation too. Mehehe. It’s okay, I uploaded three videos last week anyway. I want to have a glass of wine tonight, but I’m still full from all the festivities earlier.

I remember being in a bad mood yesterday. I’m not sure whether it had something to do with the holiday blues, but something doesn’t feel right. 😦 But I’m okay now! I had some wine last night on Christmas Eve while listening to my newly bought record player. Then, mom and I facetime-d each other for hours. I was just casually drinking wine in front of her and I suddenly felt old. I remember three-four years ago when I would feel awkward drinking in front of her, you know, like the thought that she knows I can already drink was kind of weird for me.

Wow, I had to pause writing for like good ten minutes there. Uhm, there were these thoughts and sentiments that washed over me. It was all over the place, but mostly, I thought of how days flew by it feels like a blur.

Let me end this post on a good note! Again, Merry Christmas! 🎄 I hope you all got what you wished for this Christmas! I’m extremely thankful for the love and support from you guys. Keep safe and God bless always. Let’s spread love not hate 🙂

Calm Down, It’s Friday

Hi there. It’s currently 10am on a Friday. I’m just taking a quick break from my work. How you all been doing? Me? I’m doing better, really. Even though I did not pass my road test the other day, it’s not something worth to be stressed about. I’ve been busy though. Later after work, I will start packing my batch 2 items to be picked up on Sunday. I’ve been actually feeling not bad, you know? I just realized it now. A year ago, I didn’t have any inkling of what my life’s gonna be after graduation. Not to say that I have it now because I still don’t, trust me. But I mean, I’m less scared than I was a year ago. That counts for something, right? I can say I’ve grown a lot over the past two years and even more after I graduated. Having the pressure of being an adult will certainly give you all the life lessons you need to grow.

I realize some people might describe my life as boring and uneventful. Not to me though, it’s not. If I could extend my body’s battery for a day, I would. But I only have 12-15 hours a day to do the stuff I need to and that’s not even enough on some days.

Let’s not forget the fact that it’s Friday today! And nothing could go wrong on any Friday. Hihi.

Well, well. Have a great weekend folks!

-gee

10.28.20 ☕️

dear no one,

It’s past 9 pm now. It used to be my bedtime but not anymore. For today, I decided to settle to bed a little early than my usual and write about how my day went. I had a busy day and worked overtime because I’m preparing for the company year-end. On my way home, I stopped by at a grocery store to buy sweet potatoes, an instant coffee, and a bag of oranges. I have never bought an instant coffee for myself! Does this mean I’m officially an adult? Man, I tell ya I drink coffee every day now. I’m starting to feel it’s something I have to drink in the morning before my day officially starts and probably the reason why I sleep late these days.

I don’t know what to say more about my day. It feels good to share a little of how my day went though. Just to give you a little warning that my thoughts are running wild and I’ll be talking some random stuff from hereon.

I wish nights were longer. It’s just full of hope, sadness, chillness and just really so much time to think things through. I cannot wait to spend my nights with the people I love. I can’t wait to make new memories with the dearest people in my life. Being thousand miles away from them make me appreciate every little effort they make to stay in touch.

I miss you all. Don’t worry, I’m doing the best I can here. I’ll see you very soon and when I do, I’ll make sure to never waste a second with you.

be awesome,

g

hello,

I just paid my monthly rent to my landlord the other day, which means it’s been a month since I started another chapter of my life. Lately, life has been hard a bit. Now that I’m paying a hefty amount of rent, it’s been quite a struggle when it comes to budgeting my expenses and savings. I feel like this is how it’s gonna go for the rest of my life. Work and save, I mean. It’s not like I wanna work and just play all the time, that’s not it. I’m pretty sure I’m done enjoying spending my money on some temporary happiness and useless things. I’ve been through that already. I’ve enjoyed my life accordingly. I can say that because I don’t feel like I regret anything, or missed some enjoyment in life that I should’ve experienced. This time, I want to be able to find the thing that makes me at peace. I believe happiness is not a constant thing in this world, that it’s just as quick to be taken away from a person if something ugly happens. But peace, on the other hand, it’s like it secretes this calm smart way of dealing with things from any kind of emotion a person can get. Nevertheless, I’m on a quest for that right now.

On a lighter note, work is getting interesting and busier. I have tons of paperwork piled up. I know I can do it. Also, I’ve been drinking coffee almost every day! I can’t help it now, it’s like my brain won’t function well for the day if I don’t get a sip. And it doesn’t help that it’s free in my work.

Also, last week was my last weekly YT vlogs. Right now, I’m in the middle of preparing another information video. I haven’t done that in a long time. So if there’s any topic you want me to discuss, do let me know by leaving a comment down below. It’s easier to keep track of that way than messaging me online.

Thanks for reaching this far in my post. I’m gonna go back to my day and do my best to have a productive day as I’m starting to get really sleepy in my position in bed now. I love you all.

ja ne,
gure 🍵

how things are lately

Hey guys, how long has it been?! A lot has happened since the last time I blog. Not sure if I’ve mentioned that I’m finally done with school, but I think I might have mentioned that already. My work from home setup has stopped two months ago. It’s been back to normal here in BC for a couple of months now, that’s why WFM kind of no longer makes sense in my position.

I’ve also moved out of my old place. I didn’t think it was gonna happen until later this year or even early next year, but it did. It was the most stressful week for me that has happened after graduating. I like the new place I’m staying at. I have a spacious room that I am renting. Of course, I still can’t afford to pay for my own place. Real estate here in Vancouver is crazy high. But the best thing is I’m not cooking my food anymore! I’m finally eating properly—maybe even more than necessary. It’s kinda a homestay, so food is being prepared for us. I no longer have to stress about what to cook after a long day of work. One of the great things as well is that I’m now only a 20-minute walk away from my workplace, which saves me a lot for my fare. And I can just easily allocate that to my rent expense.

All things considered, I’m very satisfied and contented with how things are doing regarding my wellbeing. I could always wish for a much comfortable way of living, but that’s not going to help me grow as a person. I’m still adjusting from being a part-time employee to a full-time one. It’s amazing how time flies so fast. Now, I wake up every day and do the same thing all over again. When I was still studying, things were a bit unpredictable. However, I would still choose where I am right now. I like moving forward, even though sometimes, all I do is rant about how things are hard in life. It’s how I cope up, I guess. At the end of the day, I always end it with me being grateful for everything that I have. I always think that I’m in a much better place than before no matter how things are hard. But of course, this is also because I have a great support system in my life.

Hopefully, you guys are hanging in there. I know it’s a tough time. I would just like to say that being sad, unproductive, angry, and all kinds of negative energy and feelings are okay to be felt right now. But also, it doesn’t mean that we can live in that state for too long. There is always someone and something that could uplift us from whatever we’re feeling. We just gotta be open-minded and ready for it to change us. Remember that at this time, people need each other, so don’t be a stranger to anyone especially at this time of crisis.

Love lots and wear your mask,
Gee

Thank You, I Made It

Happy Monday Everyone!

 

Here I am, trying to get a great start off of my week. I woke up a bit late today, but actually, I don’t think it is that late considering I almost always sleep super late nowadays. But as soon as I wake up, I decided I wanted to start my day exercising. So I did. Afterward, I felt like I was gonna pass out so I prepared myself some breakfast. And now, I’m just sitting at my study table/work table/dining table/sleeping table.

I made a list last night of the things that I’m supposed to do this week. Although it’s still a little bit all over the place, at least I have something to cross off this week. So for today, I’m supposed to start work SERIOUSLY. But as you can see, it’s already past lunchtime, and all I’ve accomplished so far is exercising. But I don’t want any negativity this day, so I’m just gonna think of this as kinda prepping my day for something productive to happen.

Aside from working in a serious mode today, I am also planning on going out probably later this afternoon or tomorrow to pick up my package from UPS. I have no idea what it is, but I’m always excited to receive packages. It’s been so long that I’ve been cooped up inside my room, so excessive online shopping was bound to happen. I’d like to make a video about my quarantine online shopping haul, so I’m just kinda waiting for everything to arrive.

Now, this post is going nowhere important, but thank you for reaching this far. If you have seen my recent video regarding ‘a look at my virtual class’, I have mentioned that I am almost done with my school. And you guys know that I always announce everything firsthand in this blog rather than my any social media, so yes…

I finally graduated from a 2-year program at Langara College. It was such a freakin roller coaster show. Honestly, it was the second toughest of all the toughest experiences that I’ve had in my entire life. But right after I graduated, I was like, ‘so that’s it?’. Now I just wake up and think about nothing else and it feels so liberating knowing that I’ve passed every single one of those subjects that made me cry at night. I feel so proud of myself for making it through without failing a subject. And even if I did and I still made it through graduation this year, I’d still feel equally proud. Of course, I’m pretty sure lots and lots of you guys, from my blog readers to my YouTube subscribers, prayed and hoped for me to be able to make it, so a BIG THANKS TO YOU. You guys have been so supportive to me. I know I have shared a lot of my journeys with you, but you guys made it memorable for me as well. I came across a lot of opportunities and friends because of my YouTube channel. And those gave me such unique experiences and lessons that I never thought was possible for me.

My journey does not stop here, it is only another beginning of something better. So I hope that you’ll continue to be there with me through this blog and my social media. I’m in the middle of processing my work permit. In the meantime, I am working on WFH. But considering how things are getting back to normal in BC, I might start working on the office at the end of June 2020.

If you guys haven’t checked out my Instagram, please follow me as I’m mostly active on that platform. I’ll see you guys soon. Hopefully, we get to meet in person. And I’m considering sending out mail to each one of you(that is if you’re willing to share your address 😉), so do let me know in my email or IG.

 

Again, as always, you guys are awesome! I LOVE YOU!

 

xoxo,

Glaire

 

appreciate & love

you,

 

I opened my window and curtain which rarely happens since I’m scared of the light. But I’m trying to change my scenery every day or else I’m gonna start banging my head at every four corners of my room. Anyway, I started playing a Frank Sinatra playlist and I instantly got into another level of mood. My room started to get chilly because it was windy outside and clouds were gloomy.

*Young At Heart by Frank Sinatra on cue*

Then my imagination wandered…

He and I dancing with these love songs somewhere simple and cozy. I’m wearing a pale yellow dress just above my knee paired with simple cream-colored doll shoes. My hair in braids with cute little flower clips around my hair. While he’s looking amazingly good as always wearing my favorite sweatshirt on him. And he’s got healthier hair than mine, I’m jealous. It’s just the two of us dancing around the music while we whisper sappy compliments at each other. Then, another creature comes at our feet begging for attention. It’s big and furry and brown: our adopted dog. We both looked down, “Aww, come here.” and we scoop her(yes, it’s a she!) up. My god, she’s heavy! The three of us sat on the couch and put the dog on our laps. My head on his shoulder and his hand around my shoulder. I feel safe. We both feel safe. 

Then my imagination was stopped by the overwhelming wonderful feeling. I stopped to savor the moment while looking out of the window. The clouds were getting darker and darker and I can’t help but still be hopeful. I want to believe that my imagination will come true. I know it’s kind of hard to think that far past this crisis at the moment, but there’s always something to look forward to, to get me to keep going. For my happily ever after, I’ll continue to live and stay healthy for my love ones. I will see them again. I will see him again. And when I do, the first thing I’ll say is how much I love them.

 

keep safe human,

glaire

 

 

 

just a bit more

I miss vlogging, honestly. But I’m just dying out here tryna juggle my studies and work. Work is not a major problem, but there’s too much school stuff and my courses this term are freaking hard. I mean not the course probably but my professors are making it so complicated, I swear if we had different instructors, I wouldn’t bleed this much. I can’t even find the time to want to film. I feel so guilty even touching my camera when I could’ve been reviewing. Everything just sucks right now. I wanna get back to editing already. If there were even times that I seem to be having fun on social media, I swear those were the only times I was free. I just finished one bloody midterm and right after we’ve been bombarded with presentations and reports already. So close to having a good night’s sleep. I find myself sighing all the time, I’m starting to think whether it’s just the stress or my lungs are starting to fail. I cried myself to sleep last night even. I didn’t even plan it. I just couldn’t take it. It felt good though right after I cried. It was loud. It was messy. Lights were off and I just let it all out and I could imagine an ugly crybaby while I was in the middle of bawling and the image was kinda funny so it made me calm down a bit after. Today is another day, another day about to end and I decided to finally write something about it. What more can I say? This is life. I know it doesn’t end here. I’m not gonna study for my whole life. All I’m saying is fuck this I’m so tired. I wanna quit, but I’m so close to the end line I can almost see its shadow lurking. Konti nalang please.

Blue For Days

Just got back from the Philippines yesterday around 5pm. I was home around 8pm and started unpacking my stuff. I slept around 11pm and woke up 6:30am. And here I am at the moment on the way to my work at Vancouver. I feel sad. It finally hit me I miss my family. I get so teary eyed thinking about them.

This is why I didn’t want to go home in the first place. I know I’ll be feeling this way once I came back. It’s gonna be a hell of sad weeks for me. Although, I don’t regret going home. I’d do it all over again even if I know I’ll be feeling miserable afterwards. They’re worth it.

Looking on the brighter side, this motivates me to do better in Canada. The longing feeling always gets better. Remember that. It doesn’t go away but it sucks less in time.

*tears building up my eyes*

*tries to hold it*

*couldn’t hold it any longer*

*doesn’t give a damn I’m in a bus and cries*

*forgot to bring tissue*

*stops writing just cause it’s too much*