Can Too Much Anticipation Kill?

I cannot wait for my application to be done with. I just got the tracking number to track my application just the other day, and I’ve been checking on it since then. I know it doesn’t make sense to worry and write things about this, but I am freaking out. I am sick, like literally, and all I could think about is if I’m approved or not. It’s been close to a month since I last worked out, which was crazy because I have been leaning more into meat and rice for the last couple of days. I’m not that worried yet about my weight, but I’m concerned a little bit about my health. I need to move and exercise more. But right now, I’m sick and exerting more effort won’t do any good for my body.

So I busy myself with cleaning my room, organizing my stuff, writing in my journal, revamping my blog and watching a bunch of tutorials. I should really start making that video on our La Union trip, but I just don’t get that inspiration yet. All of the videos I made were made out of sheer inspiration if that makes sense. I don’t like ‘trying’ to make a video. I do it when I want to and I feel like doing it. I don’t do it for the sake just to have a video coming out of a trip.

I think there are things that I wanted to share and do right now, but something is holding me back. And that’s the fear of not being able to get a student permit. I kinda feel everything is put on hold before the decision and that I could only resume my normal life once it has been decided.

If you’ve been reading my previous posts about me having that inner peace, well that’s not true anymore. HAHAHA. Who am I kidding? I’m not at peace, yo! I can’t even do the one thing that I’m good at and that’s sleeping early. Now, I can’t do that. 12 am is usually when drowsiness hits me and that’s not even good for my low blood pressure. Anyhow, I still have a month to wait. AND THIS IS KILLING ME, YOU THINK?!


glaire 😦

Story of A Lonesome But Awesome Girl

I’m all alone right now waiting for my next class. Damn. Where are my friends when I need them? 🙂 Anyway, I had no choice but to settle in a corner while people passed by in front of me and sometimes doing surreptitious glance in my direction. Good thing I always bring with me my diary. So I casually open my diary and took notes of my current situation but then to my dismay, a group of people stopped in front of me! I got embarrased so I quickly closed my diary.

So here I am, earphones plugged listening to R&B songs. Currently playing Money Trees by Kendrick Lamar. Chillin’ while blogging , Ya Bish 😀

It go Halle Berry. Or Halleluiah. :))) Can’t help but to sing with this upbeat song.

Hit the street then we break the code, no way!

The song just ended. 😦

Sunset by Kid Ink is now playing. 😀 I gotta say thank you again for my friend for giving these awesome life savers.

I know you’re so interested in my life right now. But like every other stories, the story has to end somehow. So now, I gotta go run to my class and live my life and learn and talk and operate and live and learn and whaaat ’cause that’s just how awesome people like me live, ya bish. 😀


Waiting for my dad to pick me up for school. 😀 Yesterday was a holiday so you know the feeling of coming back to school. And not to mention that it’s a summer class and that it’s supposed to be a summer vacation. But I’m not gonna whine much about this ’cause hopefully this is gonna be my last summer class for college before I graduate.

~ G