You know I sometimes spend my time reading life and love quotes and finding myself falling deeply in love with the moment. Then, I would argue to myself how just reading it makes me feel amazing; how much more in real life,right? I would feel so hopeful about love at the same time so sad I’d cry. But then just right after I’m done reading all the sappy quotes, all the drama and dreamy emotions die w/ the moment too. The same feeling you get when you try to remember the dream you’ve had the other night—the more you try to chase the memory the more it goes away. That exact feeling. And somehow, it’s sad for me that I can’t even hold on to that sentiment. I feel hopeless, whenever.
Doing this blog entry while waiting for the Amtrak train bound to Chicago. I’m waiting outside the station just right out beside the tracks itself and I feel cold! My fingers are starting to get numb and my nose is stuffy. Indeed, Autumn season 🍂 has come. I can see people have been using scarfs and boots again. While me? Meh. Just with my usual jacket. Haha. Okay time to go!
Today marks my remaining last 10 days at work(Springfield, IL, mostly). Lately, I have been working 12 hours a day with my team—and the rest of them still work at home—so not really complaining here lol. Because it’s the busy season, there’s no time to slack or even go to the gym which sucks but understandable on my part. I know it’s normal and it’s part of my training or whatever and everyone’s been very nice and considerate to me. I’m just glad that my efforts and hard work are being appreciated by my teammates.
As a tradition, the team takes out or treats their own teammate if he/she is leaving. So tonight, I was treated dinner together with my team! I feel so special! Earlier they asked me where I wanted to eat and I said anything Japanese and my manager was like are you sure and she started searching on Yelp. She goes on about the reviews of every restaurant lol she was so funny because she would really go on with all these negative comments and then skip on the next restaurant. 😪😅 Until finally, she found this place called Happy Sushi. Everyone on my team was being hesitant of the place but we still insisted to go there. We got off work early and went straight to the place. It was like less than 5 minutes away by car but we almost got lost! Crazy 😁
I was the first one to go inside the restaurant and I was really surprised to see that the place was so small. Like all of us barely fit because the place was packed and guess what there were just four small tables! I was about to give a helpless look to my colleagues when this waitress ushered us to a table inside—I though it was the kitchen entry—and we literally like passed thru their kitchen side kinda gross really but whatever haha. So when we were seated—btw there were four of us—we started looking with each other and trying not to laugh! The place was ridiculously cramped but yeah we gave our orders after a while. It turns out, the food was amazing! Everyone
liked it loved it! We were exchanging conversations while eating and before I know it I was in the hot seat. I found myself talking about my dating life to them. It was a nice kind of conversation, you know l didn’t find myself uncomfortable sharing what I’m experiencing and my views. The dinner was not boring and I feel like it wasn’t just a regular dine out because I get to really interact and talk to them so I really enjoyed every second with them tonight.
Glad to be in such a wonderful team!
I love my life ❤️❤️❤️❤️😭😭😭😭😭😭 I love you, Chicago.
I talked to a dear friend yesterday and she told me how she cannot find the words to write to which of course, I told her how I myself haven’t visited my own blog in a while. So here I am without any doubt about to ramble nonsense thoughts again.
Officially, I only have a month left in Chicago. You must be curious as to what I feel, eh? Well, I feel a lot of things! I have come to love Chicago or basically here in the United States. I have met a lot of people that changed my perspectives in life. I learned and proved to myself being independent is a good thing. Enjoying my life without any responsibility is such a big privilege but like all other things in life, this amazing chapter has to end. So I am happy that in a short period of time, I had such a wonderful time with new found friends, family and myself. And although inevitably there are things I wish would stay permanent with me, life goes on and I could only hope for the best! It’s also funny how I miss home now more than ever. I find myself getting excited and homesick already. Looking back to my first few months, all I kept thinking was how on earth could I stay here and never go back but now…I miss home.
So, see you Philippines in a month! 😊
Lately, I have been so unfocused in everything. I feel like I am lost somewhere along the way and I keep on looking and asking for directions yet I am still nowhere to be found.
“It’s weird. I’ve finally come to terms with you being gone. I’ve even accepted the heartache. I don’t miss you anymore; I’m not crying over you anymore. I smile now. I laugh harder than ever. I’m genuinely happy. I can’t believe I’m able to say this, but I’m okay. I’m really okay.’