My cute ass was dragged all weekday for IELTS review last week, and as if that weren’t enough, I had to speak in front of everyone every damn day. It was the speaking module week, that’s why. I just got so nervous without any warning and I usually can’t speak straight when I’m scared! I kept trying to shake off the uneasiness by thinking about funny or good memories but it was no help. Really, the more I tried the more it worsened.
Just earlier, I asked a friend a question that resulted to a misunderstanding between us. What happened was that friend replied something stupid to my question making me feel like a fool. And now I’m hurt that’s why, I’m drawing away my attention to anything that won’t trigger my mind to remember the incident.
So today I find myself asking what is a good distraction from things I don’t want to think?
After a thought…
All I can think about is I’m crazy to assume that any diversion would work. I realize I probably just have to face it head-on and give myself a break. Well, how about just speaking freely not caring about possible mistakes or just letting myself stutter until I can finally fucking deliver it clearly? Like why worry about that friend when I know it wouldn’t be a freakin’ lost if I lose that one person? I mean just do your thing and stop worrying, self.
It makes sense, right? I can’t worry about everything all at once. There’s just so much to do and only hours in a day. Just one fucking thing at a time. If certain fate is meant to be yours, then what’s the rush? I know it is easier to say and realize all of these things than actually doing and applying it in life. But I think when you know what’s going on, you’ll actually find a way to make it right—well, at least you’ve made you’re first step to the lifeline.
Today marks my remaining last 10 days at work(Springfield, IL, mostly). Lately, I have been working 12 hours a day with my team—and the rest of them still work at home—so not really complaining here lol. Because it’s the busy season, there’s no time to slack or even go to the gym which sucks but understandable on my part. I know it’s normal and it’s part of my training or whatever and everyone’s been very nice and considerate to me. I’m just glad that my efforts and hard work are being appreciated by my teammates.
As a tradition, the team takes out or treats their own teammate if he/she is leaving. So tonight, I was treated dinner together with my team! I feel so special! Earlier they asked me where I wanted to eat and I said anything Japanese and my manager was like are you sure and she started searching on Yelp. She goes on about the reviews of every restaurant lol she was so funny because she would really go on with all these negative comments and then skip on the next restaurant. 😪😅 Until finally, she found this place called Happy Sushi. Everyone on my team was being hesitant of the place but we still insisted to go there. We got off work early and went straight to the place. It was like less than 5 minutes away by car but we almost got lost! Crazy 😁
I was the first one to go inside the restaurant and I was really surprised to see that the place was so small. Like all of us barely fit because the place was packed and guess what there were just four small tables! I was about to give a helpless look to my colleagues when this waitress ushered us to a table inside—I though it was the kitchen entry—and we literally like passed thru their kitchen side kinda gross really but whatever haha. So when we were seated—btw there were four of us—we started looking with each other and trying not to laugh! The place was ridiculously cramped but yeah we gave our orders after a while. It turns out, the food was amazing! Everyone
liked it loved it! We were exchanging conversations while eating and before I know it I was in the hot seat. I found myself talking about my dating life to them. It was a nice kind of conversation, you know l didn’t find myself uncomfortable sharing what I’m experiencing and my views. The dinner was not boring and I feel like it wasn’t just a regular dine out because I get to really interact and talk to them so I really enjoyed every second with them tonight.
Glad to be in such a wonderful team!
Holiday for today! I didn’t go with my mom because I told her I’m gonna study for the finals tomorrow. 🙊 But instead of me studying, I’m preocuppied of doing unnecessary things like reading books, writing in my diary and nonstop eating! Why now?! 😭 I have three major exams tomorrow and another three on thursday and last one on next Monday and voila! SEM BREAK! Can’t wait but first I need to study to pass my subjects specially now that I’m a graduating student. 😱 Anyway, calm down people! I still need to go the gym later. Maybe my mind will start to work if I worked out my body first. Aye aye so smart of me! 😁
I’m getting cray cray again! 🔫 Too early for me to go apeshit. 😅 SIGNING OUT!
What was I thinking?! Saturday is always a non-uniform day. Instead, went to school today wearing uniform.
Damn. I was walking my way confidently until my eyes swept to the groups of student crossing my path and I was like ‘Uhuh. They are wearing civilian. What’s up with them?’ and clueless as I was, just marched past them. Just when the weird vibes was getting off me and I’m about to climb the stairs, I saw my two friends and surprisingly they were also wearing civilian. And that’s the only time I realized that I was the weird one. But I thought today was Friday! Come on!
I was dumbfounded and I had no choice but to go on with my life and trudged towards my classroom. Good thing tho, there’s my father. I let him get my pants, a t-shirt and sandals. 😉
Dang! After that, my embarrassing moment was done. Poof. 🙂 Next thing I knew, I was in a restaurant with my friends eating sushi. Again. Anyway, god help me my friends were on chatting mode again! All of them were either Omegle-ing or Chatous-ing. What a word. Pfft. 🙂 Funny thing happened, my best friend asked for a pic to the guy he’s been chatting with and she received a picture of the guy’s Ding Dong. Eck. Some horny sonofawhore. My bestie swore never to use Chatous again. Oh promises, promises. 😉
Went home with a smile on my face but ended up scowling because of my brother. He spilled my secret to dad. Traitor. Now I’m not talking to him.
One helluva day. Hope y’all have had good day too.