Yesterday was one of those days when I usually wake up late, work out and binge watch movies. So I decided to hit up my friends invite them for dinner or late night coffee. It was kind of spontaneous and I’m glad we were complete last night. We went to a restaurant where there was a nice view of the surroundings, chatted up a bit self update and a little more girl gossips. Last night was a very familiar and homey feeling with the girls. I hope to do more of these.
Rainy Day On A Tuesday
😭 I love days like this.
Last day of the month of October! Time is running to fast, don’t you think so?!
Today is the start of the three non-working holiday for the celebration of All Souls and All Saints Day. There’s no other perfect way to spend the first day of this holiday with a gloomy weather. I imagine people waking up to the sound of the rain with their messy hairs and a cup of coffee in their hand. It just feels so peaceful today. I can’t describe my love for the rain.
See, I was craving for Takoyaki so I decided to bring my siblings to my favorite Takoyaki place. We drove even though it was raining cats and dogs! My brothers are headed to my dad’s place anyway, so we had to eat first and they had to drop me off again. After my craving was satisfied, I didn’t exactly plan to stay in bed and sleep the day ’cause I wanted this day to be productive sort of, so I decided to play piano and master a piece. The last piece I memorized was the song Only Hope by Mandy Moore. I remember my two brothers got interested in playing piano because of that song. Ever since, they can’t stop playing piano and now they play it better than I do. But after a while, my fingers were feeling pretty sore already so I stopped.
It is already 1pm in the afternoon and I feel like the clock is ticking so fast. Probably because I’ve been busy up until I stopped playing the piano. What to do next now? I was thinking I could redesigned my whole blog. Or I could write on my diary notebook. Or maybe just watch a movie on Netflix but that would be ruining my productive day.
Tomorrow, my family and I will be heading to my grandma’s place to celebrate the holiday. Besides, all our loved ones were buried in that place so it’s just right to be there.
It’s so nice having this kind of weather, you know! It makes me feel kinds of sentiments. Or maybe…now that I think about it, the cuddle weather has come! I wish there was someone to cuddle with. Just kidding, my Pooh bear is enough to keep me company. But yes, my favorite has finally come. The time for wearing cute sweaters, sipping coffee while reading a book, giving gifts and receiving them, gosh just thinking about all those makes me excited. I had a pretty bad Christmas last year when I just came back from the USA because of the typhoon. Hopefully this year, may I have the best one. 🙂 I’ve babbled a lot now. Rain can do that to me.
In life, it’s seldom we found someone who gets us. Someone who we instantly love the moment we meet them. It’s such a rare occasion that when that certain person comes, we grab them and make sure they feel safe and loved. In most cases, people expect this to advance into some kind of romantic intimacy—which is ridiculous, really. On the other hand, it may lead to a long-life friendship. So let me throw a question, if you meet someone who really gets your vibe and interests in life, what kind of relationship would your inner-self choose to have with that someone—as a friend or a lover? It’s a tricky question, I know. The answer gets complicated the more you think about it. Ha.
My answer? I always go for friendship. But isn’t that always the case or mostly how it is for everyone? I mean, doesn’t a relationship begins at something before being lovers? And there’s nothing quite like how we, Millennials, deal with being in a ‘relationship’. There are even the so-called stages of relationship amongst 20-somethings that start out as being friends > talking stage > friends with benefits > hooking up > dating > exclusivity/to being lover. It’s one hella ride for young people to be in love, nowadays. No wonder Millennials are tagged to be the worst generation and no doubt about how older generations are laughing at us right now.
Having a fair share of my being part of the Millennial generation, I’ve experienced this roller coaster ride of being in a relationship myself. The one thing I can say is it’s just not for me. I might have done it wrong but I’ve had enough for now. I’ll choose friendship over love not because it will be the safe choice but because I’ve been there done thatrelationship thing and now I know better than to risk any good friendship with love. I’m not saying I’m all closed door for finding love but it’s not something that I am expecting to come in my life anytime soon. Setting my mind to that note, it keeps me from jumping to conclusions and expecting to find love in every guy that I meet. At the same time, without the expectations of any kind, it lets me create a deeper connection with someone I truly find interesting. It’s like I don’t have to worry about being the perfect girl because who’s judging, right? 🙂 No one but a good friend of mine.
Lovers just take it to different level, you know? Sure, there’s no doubt about how colorful our lives when they are there. No one can actually make us feel the same way that they do to us. It’s magical and how we wish it would never end. But have you had any relationship with someone that it ended badly, but then you realize you were so good together as friends than lovers, that you wish you could turn back time and just be friends instead? It’s a shame, isn’t it? Makes you regret just enough to wish for things to go back to the way you were as friends. That’s why I’ll always choose friendship over love.
Some people ask me what if you could have found your true happiness with that someone, but you settled as friends so you ended up throwing away the one shot deal? Honestly, I’m not worried. I’ve never been worried about missing my chances at being happy with someone because I know it’s not something that I could never find in myself. I produce my own sunshine and happiness. We all do! It’s on me to share it to other people. I never needed someone to make me feel whole because I am complete whether someone is holding my hand or not.
So what I need is a friend who knows me well, who’ll understand my tantrums and deal with it. Someone I can laugh with and share my stories with. A friend who I can talk whatever with no boundaries whatsoever. A friend who can be my plus one in parties and get drunk with. One who’ll ask me to a slow dance even with a pop music playing. A guy my parents can be comfortable with. Just someone who gets me. I have always believed that two opposite genders can have a platonic relationship. Being anything more than friends is just another label. What matters is the strong foundation and relationship I have with that person. If it turns out that my best friend is the one, wouldn’t that be great?! But if not, a best friend for life is not a loss love at all.
Choose carefully. And learn to love yourself.
100 SUBSCRIBERS IN YOUTUBE?! You guys are the best!!!!!
Last 4 months, I began being active in the YouTube community wherein I constantly post—is posting two videos in four months considered constant?—and actively comment on videos to sub on my channel haha. It gives me great joy to share my videos on the internet. Of course, there’s the hope of getting known duh, but nope it’s not my first priority. These past months, I have learned to love YouTube. I have been watching nonstop YouTube videos about almost anything but mostly about travel vlogs and tutorials on cinematic videos. I have also learned more stuff about editing and using transitions to enhance and to make sick edits lol oh yeah. I can’t explain how much excitement I feel when I edit or when I take videos of myself and other people. Even my friends now call me “vlogger”, I don’t exactly feel shy when I vlog around but I’m not totally confident yet. I haven’t even got past the point of being able to talk in front of the camera with my friends around. I mean I hate speaking in front of people I have the phobia and all but I just love the concept of vlogging that it makes it want to overcome that fear. Ever since I was kid, I have been recording through my phone and camera. I remember using Windows Movie Maker to compose a compilation of my photos and make it into a video with background music.
Anyway, I am planning to upload videos for as long as it gives me happiness. It’s actually quite fun and rewarding to be able to receive comments and love from people you don’t know! I feel like this is my one of my true hobbies in life. And I think I’m going to be doing this for a long time.
PLEASE SUBSCRIBE TO MY CHANNEL!!!! IT WOULD MEAN THE WORLD TO ME AND MY DREAMS. I subscribe back, you guys! I’m actually looking to do a collab. Hmu if you want! 🙂
Neglecting my blog no more. I know I have been absent for the last couple of weeks. So here’s a recap. We visited South Korea for ten days. We were just in Seoul the whole time. It was still pretty cold although it’s Springtime already. Also, it’s been a month since I was experiencing severe coughing so I had myself checked up and found out my asthma has returned. I haven’t used Nebulizer since I was a little kid. I can’t even remember it anymore. So no more inhaling vape shit or shisha. I’m done. What else? Hmmm. Oh. I cut my own hair and had a fringe. Happened on a night when I had nothing to do. Picked a scissor. Opened Youtube. And cut cut cut cut. Hahaha. Turns out…Best DIY ever that has happened to me. I guess it suits me. Now, it’s me and my bangs every single day that I have to take care of. But mostly, I just clip my fringe up if I don’t feel like letting it loose down. It’s a bothersome and requires too much effort. I don’t have the patience to fix my hair all the time.
I guess that’s just it. Hihi. Babush!
There is no doubt about the amount of love I have when it comes to reading books. Mostly, I read romance, sci-fi, young-adult, chick-lit and mystery. What I usually do is I read a new genre after another—it serves as a refresher to my mind. Too much romance makes my brain dizzy, same thing with sci-fi it becomes boring if I read another one—unless it’s in series. It’s like I have this on and off relationship with books which brings me to my confession about how I stopped reading for a year now and totally forgot about GoodReads Reading Challenge.
GoodReads is like a database for all the books out in the market. It’s like Yelp for books with reviews, quotes and whatnot. So whenever I’m running out of books to read, I go to their website and look up to some interesting read. My favorite part is the GoodReads Reading Challenge.
So this is done yearly, the mechanics is for you to set a goal number that you think you’ll be able to read for the entire year. And whenever you finish a book, you’ll include it in your ‘read’ section. So far my best record was last 2013. I read 41 books out of my goal of 40.
My worst record was last year. I can’t believe I just got 4 out of 20! I guess I really did forget everything else when I was in Chicago last year, eh?
But this year, I don’t have any excuses not to read so I set my goal to 10 books for 2017 challenge. I don’t want to feel overwhelmed so I’ll just have to adjust it later after I come close to my number. Good news though, as of now I have read 6 books! Not long before I adjust it to 30. Hopefully, I’ll top my best record and make it 50 this year. 🙂
Wish me luck!
My cute ass was dragged all weekday for IELTS review last week, and as if that weren’t enough, I had to speak in front of everyone every damn day. It was the speaking module week, that’s why. I just got so nervous without any warning and I usually can’t speak straight when I’m scared! I kept trying to shake off the uneasiness by thinking about funny or good memories but it was no help. Really, the more I tried the more it worsened.
Just earlier, I asked a friend a question that resulted to a misunderstanding between us. What happened was that friend replied something stupid to my question making me feel like a fool. And now I’m hurt that’s why, I’m drawing away my attention to anything that won’t trigger my mind to remember the incident.
So today I find myself asking what is a good distraction from things I don’t want to think?
After a thought…
All I can think about is I’m crazy to assume that any diversion would work. I realize I probably just have to face it head-on and give myself a break. Well, how about just speaking freely not caring about possible mistakes or just letting myself stutter until I can finally fucking deliver it clearly? Like why worry about that friend when I know it wouldn’t be a freakin’ lost if I lose that one person? I mean just do your thing and stop worrying, self.
It makes sense, right? I can’t worry about everything all at once. There’s just so much to do and only hours in a day. Just one fucking thing at a time. If certain fate is meant to be yours, then what’s the rush? I know it is easier to say and realize all of these things than actually doing and applying it in life. But I think when you know what’s going on, you’ll actually find a way to make it right—well, at least you’ve made you’re first step to the lifeline.
Hmm..What’s a good topic to talk about today? How about the fact that we still don’t have electricity in our barangay for 18 days now since the typhoon? But who’s counting, right? Oh, right. I’M COUNTING THO! 😫
Well, to keep myself busy. I’ve enrolled myself to IELTS review class in my former school. So back to being student, I get up everyday and get my lazy bum to work its brain which has been difficult for me since I hate school ever since but I gotta do what I have to do so it’s been a pain the ass. Nevertheless, I’m glad I get to keep myself busy despite not having work and also learn more and improve my English LOLOLOLOL. I don’t think so hahaha blabla…Anyway, I’m just waiting around for this month to passed so that I can continue working on my application for himitsu. Hopefully, everything turns out okay for my upcoming exams. Although, I haven’t been reviewing that much, I hope I find the inspiration to work on it since the examination is just the around the corner. Regarding my plans to leave the Philippines again, there’s not much a solid plan for that yet it’s a work-in-progress atm but definitely will be back in USA or anywhere out of here again soon.
Scrambled thoughts as always…
Who would have thought I’d come to like working in Springfield? It’s only my second week and I’m already getting used to live here. Although, working hours here is longer than in Chicago I guess it’s okay. I mean I just accepted it I don’t wanna complain anymore. It’s better than doing nothing at all.
I know I said I’ll be posting story about my birthday but I haven’t found the inspiration to share at the moment. So let’s skip it for now, hopefully I won’t forget it tho I have been going out ever since I turned 21. It’s what I look forward to now: Friday and Saturday nights. You know, I’m doing the things that I know I want and even though at the end of the day part of me is tired and would just rather spend the day on my bed forever, I still want to explore. Because I know myself, and I’ll regret the things that I didn’t do when I knew I had the chance. Anyho, Vegas on the first of July! Did I guys tell you that? 😬 I cannot wait! My first West Coast visit wohooo. This better be awesome.
But reality check…
Four months. Only four months left here in the U.S.A. and buhbye already. I try not to think about it because I get sad every time. But hey, this won’t be the end. It’s just the beginning for me.
Hey. I am quite excited for the coming months. You see, I am anticipating something which I still cannot announce publicly. Even though I know, no one really visits this blog so who cares. 😹 Oh shut up.
**WARNING** This post contains randomness that might rock your world. Okay, so that was pushing too far. 😀
Why are you still reading this? 😕
Okay do whatever you please. Don’t say I didn’t warn you, ‘kay? 😈
Finally got back in Naga! :))
Going to have a breather now, I think.
I want to end this summer
class badly and jump right to the day when I’ll be going to vacay! I wanna wander around somewhere anywhere but here. My itchy travel feet needs some love!
Anyways, I was listening to Lorde’s ‘Team’ and this person pops up on my mind. Now that I think about it, how’d I associate this song to that person. Weird.
I NEED TO STUDY NOW! I have a long quiz on Monday. I surely won’t have time to study tomorrow ‘coz I’ll be over at our store helping my mom. I know I know
I’m such a good daughter. Not to mention my humbleness. it’ll be tiring for me the next day but that’s just how my life is.
OMFG! Someone tweeted someone. Hmmm. ❤
I've been ranting too much now and it's probably more than you can handle. I need to stop, don't I? 🙂
Tho seriously, you probably think I'm some kind of a suicidal person with all the sad posts I've been posting. But no, my life isn't that lonely. In fact, I'm so happy and busy enjoying my life I barely have enough time to share it to you guys. Sorry 'bout my almost every week of ranting. The truth is, most of the time I'm actively writing is when I'm sad and lonely and confused and whenever I'm on the verge of crying. I dunno why!
*btw, this is a revised version. My
first second thirdone got deleted.WHAT IS WRONG WITH WORDPRESS MOBILE APP?! I was so pissed when I had to rewrite the whole thing (Well not the whole thing thrice. Just twice). Somehow it doesn't feel right anymore. But oh well, what the hell.
I woke up this morning learning that I have been nominated for Liebster Award. Yay!! My first ever blog award. I’d like to give special thanks Megan for nominating me. You rock, Megan. 🙂
The ‘Liebster Award’ is an award which can be given to bloggers with under 200 followers so get them in contact with other bloggers and know in the blogging community. After completing this post, I will be informing those who I wish to nominate for this award, so the rules will be posted below for everyone to see.
•List 11 facts about yourself
•Answer 11 questions that’s given by the one who nominated you.
•Create 11 new questions
•List some bloggers under the 200 followers and tag them in your post and let them know!
11 Random facts about me
1. I don’t like burgers and I’m not into fries that much. *nose scrunch*
2. My lucky numbers are two and thirteen. Two, just because I like it. ^^ Thirteen, because it’s my birth date.
3. I’m a big collector of little cute post-it. Especially those with vintage design.
4. Beef jerky! I could be thrown far far away in a land of nowhere and still survive. Just give me a handful of those please.
5. I’d like to think I’m good at playing Sudoku and Rubix cube. 🙂 Math geek, eh? Not really 😉
6. I have a thing for musicians. I like a guy who could play a guitar. Ghaad. Just thinking about it gives me the chills.
7. I’m quite an independent woman in a sense that I wouldn’t give a fudge just because I’m by myself watching a movie or to strolling in a mall or whatever. But still, having company is much better and I prefer having someone with me as much as possible.
8. I can’t cook. I just can’t, damnit!
9. Wanderlust, my personal favorite. I could spend my whole life wandering and meandering aimlessly. I love traveling and all that screams ADVENTURE!
10. I love anything that’s vintage.
11. I love water in general. I prefer rain so much than the sun. I’m a beach rather than a swimming pool person. I love going in the middle of the ocean with nothing but a swimming goggles.
My Answers to Liv’s Question
1. Do you have a hidden talent?
Yep. I can do the aging voice. Haha. I know it’s not much but I’m proud of it because my family can’t. Lol. A lot of people got fooled by my talent too. Funny times.
2. What’s your favorite quote?
Everything happens for a reason. As cliche as it sounds, this one is a lot deeper than one can think.
3. What do like doing besides blogging?
I seldom blog so these are the things that I usually do. Listening to music, writing diary, running, watching movies, reading books, playing with my baby sis, chatting, tumblring, imagining, and sleeping during afternoons.
4. What is your dream job?
I don’t have a dream job now. But I had before. I wanted to be a dentist when I was a kid. After that, I dreamt of being a flight attendant so that I could be everywhere else. And lastly, when I was in highschool, I was contemplating to be a volunteer (peace corps, united nation or even locally).
5. What is your favorite TV program?
A South Korean game show called Running Man. Funny as shit. Watch it. 🙂
6. What is your favorite chocolate?
*nose scrunch* at the sight of the word chocolate. 🙂 I have nothing against it, it’s just not my thing. Vanilla for me is.
7. What is the weirdest/most random piece of trivia you know?
Idk any. Help me?
8. Is there any TV shows you want to start watching? If so what?
Yes please! NCSI, Suits, Law and Order, New girl, Sherlock, Friends. Too many for my little luxury time. 😦
9. What are you meant to be doing right now?
Eat my lunch. I’m starting to feel hungry but I’m all alone so maybe I’ll just leave it at that.
10. What’s your dream bedroom look like?
Uggh. Too bad I can’t show you the pic. It’s on my other pc. Anyway, I just want a small room with an open balcony so that I can use it for my telescope for stargazing. One of the things I love is stargazing 🙂 which brings me to rooftops. I want a room with an access to the attic by a ladder or anything and up in the attic I can go open an installed window and feel the night air! 🙂
11. What is your favourite thing about blogging?
I’m a sentimental person and I’d like to keep things and memories through whatever means. Blogging for me is like a diary, instead it’s online and other people have access to it. It also helps me express my emotion that only blog can satisfy. 😉
Questions for my nominees
Are ya ready all?
1. Can you describe yourself in one word?
2. What are you most grateful for?
3. Do you have a pet?
4. What’s your favorite book? Why?
5. What are the five items you can’t live without?
6. Would you rather run 20 miles or swim 5 miles?
7. Do you collect anything?
8. When I say ‘childhood’ where does your mind take you?
9. Are you a negative or a positive person?
10. What is one thing that you dislike about you?
11. Who’s your top 3 fave actresses?
And my Nominees